


It's Ok, You're Ok

by Symphoenae



Category: The Dragon Prince (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Callum-centric, F/M, I guess a little bit of hurt/comfort at the end, Vent Piece, when life sucks just pour all your issues onto Callum, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-04-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:14:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23485144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Symphoenae/pseuds/Symphoenae
Summary: Callum liked to believe in second chances, but this didn't feel like that practice would come into play. This felt like he was as bad as Viren, or Claudia. Someone that didn't deserve the idea of a second chance. It didn't feel fair that she would walk off on him that fast and easily, despite his clear willingness to comply and get better with the issue that had been brought about, the mistake he had been making. He just wished she'd talked to him sooner.
Relationships: Callum/Rayla (The Dragon Prince)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	It's Ok, You're Ok

**Author's Note:**

> Hi welcome to I made a dumb mistake a few days ago and lost a good portion of the people I considered close enough to be my support network over it and I just have a lot of stuff to get out of my head so here's this thing
> 
> SONG USED: It's Ok, You're Ok - Bonjr

Melancholy wails from realms beyond human comprehension. Foggy minds, faded, clunky memories of empty castle halls, cold and uninviting, misleading, manipulative when truth behind those talkative walls are known. To experience reality in shades of grey, because the gods up in the sky somewhere know well enough that in times like these someone like him doesn't deserve to live in color. Time moves too fast and not fast enough at the same time, his body, his mind, being pulled in two different directions and neither not knowing which direction that tempts them is the correct one, if there is a right answer at all. Hypocritical thoughts, paradoxical ideas, broken promises. All bottled up into a realm that only he could transcend, and yet here he was, drowning like that time in his dark magic dream. Heart heavy, head aching, uncoordinated thoughts, where was his bodily control? He didn't even feel like his body was his own.

Every muscle felt tense. His jaw was squared far too tightly, his teeth clenched so tightly together that he thought that they may shatter against each other if he couldn't at least get himself to relax a little. This state of mind left no room for making sense to him. A solid, coherent thought was a delicacy to come by. His fingers made a habit of rubbing up against each other in a nervous tick, although he wasn't quite sure if it was a "nervous" tick. His rate of functioning was out of his own control. He wasn't even sure what a proper state of mind was like on a good day, but the brain fog he felt was definitely far from "proper". Then again, he didn't expect to find himself out of this maze of his own accord anytime soon.

He was on the bad end of the argument- what had they even fought about again, anyway? Couldn't hear, couldn't feel, couldn't see. Couldn't think. Couldn't allow himself to remember the details, lest he start getting the notion that he had the right to feel upset about what happened on his own part. He'd made the mistake. It was his fault. As far as he could understand, he was condemned based on how quickly she was able to just walk out on him. They'd fought before, but it hadn't felt anything like this. With stinging eyes and a tightened throat, he'd realized then that that had been the point. So much so that the truth of their relationship had come into question. Perhaps he'd misread things. Despite the things they'd gone through together, perhaps their bond really was so easily breakable.

Callum liked to believe in second chances, but this didn't feel like that practice would come into play. This felt like he was as bad as Viren, or Claudia. Someone that didn't deserve the idea of a second chance. It didn't feel fair that she would walk off on him that fast and easily, despite his clear willingness to comply and get better with the issue that had been brought about, the mistake he had been making. He just wished she'd talked to him sooner.

No, no, but he couldn't think that way. That was making it all about him, wasn't it? From the predator's side, they didn't get to feel for themselves. He didn't have any right to do that right now, or at all in general. No one ever liked self-centered predators. Understatement of the century.

Emotions weren't real, anyway.

Struggling with the concept of when to allow yourself to feel bad wasn't anything new.

On the edge of the Storm Spire peak, he glanced out at his destination. Brown, feathered wings twitching slightly as he gathered up the motivation to jump, to leave. Maybe it was better this way. Despite everything, he was so easy to drop. But something stopped him.

He saw Rayla there, standing on the last step when he turned around. He folded his wing-arms as he stared back at her, eyes devoid of emotion just like he wanted. She took a step towards him, and he felt the inexplicable urge to back up, but he couldn't do that unless he wanted to fall down the side of the spire like a fool. He stayed in his place. That was something he needed to do, right?

Somewhere in between his foggy thoughts, she'd managed to get close enough to him to take his hands within hers. She gently guided him a few steps away from the edge, to a safer point. He felt himself fall forward into her chest as his tightened, shaky legs gave out. Warm arms that he didn't deserve enveloped him tightly.

"It's ok, you're ok."

A single teardrop raced down his cheek as the melancholy howls of wolves rang true again in his foggy mind.

**Author's Note:**

> Struggling with the concept of being allowed to feel bad for yourself when you messed up and have nasty self-hate issues is fun.
> 
> Especially when you know all of the details of what happened. Still. The promise of change to get better means nothing to some people. In the end, I think their choice to drop me was probably for the better, but I can't deny that it didn't hurt since I did really consider them friends. But at the same time I can't allow myself to feel bad on my end because of the context of the argument. Someone feeling for themselves and making a "big deal" was what started it all
> 
> I'll be okay.
> 
> Anyways, venting aside. You can always reach me on Instagram at @Chatinette or Tumblr @Symphoenae if you need a listening ear. Despite how poorly I treat myself with my emotions and shit, I'm always up for helping others cope. You're not alone.


End file.
